Blend: To combine or mix so that the constituent parts are indistinguishable from one another.
Sounds easy enough right? Well, when you are referring to children, it’s a complicated feat to say the least.
At first everything was great. The 14 and 13 year old girls became fast friends, my 8 year old enjoyed the fact that she had a ‘new big sister’. They had us married and talked to their friends about being ‘step-sisters’. The room was large enough and they couldn’t wait to be together forever. Well, like any new relationship, after six months the romance was gone. My fiancée’s daughter no longer was happy. She wanted ‘her room’ back. I tried to explain to her that things were different now. She would have to give a little. She decided that she would just come stay at ‘dad’s’ house when my children were staying with their father. I pointed out to her that she wanted her room to herself, but she was never in it “by herself”. It fell on deaf ears.
My fiancée’s 18 year old son was pretty good about sharing a room with my 11 year old son, but refers to it as ‘his’ room. I correct them, I get upset, I say, ‘enough’ of mine, it’s now ours.
So, now, his daughter doesn’t come here anymore. It makes me feel guilty, confused and sad. We have tried so hard, but the manipulation of a teenager, with the help of his ex and her husband, has made it impossible. My ‘Brady Bunch’ bubble has been popped.
Blending… it is as impossible as putting oil and vinegar in a blender and expecting the concoction to stay cohesive, and mingle. Linger and enjoy each other.
So, how do you ‘blend’? How do you become, a happy family?… Stay tuned…
~Elizabeth, from Maine